Me

Recently, I have turned 30.

Recently, I have finally redeemed my career.

Recently, I can finally recognise my effort again.

Graduated at age of 22 with a diploma, I am passionate to start my career. I thought my study would get me to the top. I thought I am confidence enough to take on any challenge. I worked extra hard and show off my strength; language skill, social skill, self-presentation and applying my study. In two years time, I have got myself a spot on the mid-management level of an international company. Everything just seems to click, but not in the reality. 

After one year of stressful mid-management life, I have finally got wash out by this real world. School has prepared me with knowledge and skills to survive in the industry, but not politic. Books have taught me about management, but not leading. I learned how to coach from my professor, but incapable to apply.

I quiet my job at age of 25, after a long battle to get myself where most people desire to be.

My father tried to comfort me; “you are just so brave to leave that spot while the going is good.”

I knew I have failed.  I went back to study again, to finish my degree.

Before and while in school, I have consistently asked myself the same question; “why do I fail?”

I work hard, extra hard. My boss used to enjoy my work. My subordinates used to admire my talent. My peers used to love to work with me.

What has gone wrong?

Before my promotion to the mid-management;

I scolded my team harder for better performance. I started to challenge the system. I tried to out-work everyone. I gave up friends and teammates.

After the promotion, I wanted to achieve more. I desired to change things. I worked extra harder. I stop to enjoy everything I do. I stop appreciate people and things around me. I aim for the next peak.

It is my fault for the failure. I need a change.

While I questioning myself and finally settle with such answer, there was another question popped up to my mind; “Why nobody has tried to stop me?”

I tried to recall my memories for those whom I have known made the same mistake. They were all young like me. They were all aiming for the same thing, title. We all fail almost in the same way. I quiet, they didn’t, but we all knew that we have fail ourselves. We were unhappy. We were unhappy about our so-called wonderful career achievement at young age.

But no one has ever tried to stop us. No one has tried to ask us not to try so hard for the position. No one has ever tried to remind us to appreciate life. Therefore, many of the now-a-day young talents fail from chasing a wrong dream. Worst, some did not even live with a dream, but the name.

There was no one there for me before I realized my mistake, but there can be someone there for those upcoming one, I.

That's how I got myself into training. That's how I have settled my goal. That's how I have redeemed myself. That’s how I can finally recognized myself again.

I have not achieved something great yet. I do not have a big title. I am not a millionaire or billionaire. I am not famous at all. I am nobody.

But I am happy and proud of my career. I am living my dream.

This is the beginning of my story.

If you have just failed, stay positive. Because your story might just be at the corner.

Passion in Life

Steve Job had shared his secret to success during the interview at All Things Digital 5 together with the appearance of Bill Gates. He had mentioned that “Passion” is one important driven factor to success, as any rational person would have given up if without passion.

Passion helps us to enjoy what we are up to. Passion helps us to keep up what we are doing. Tony Robbins says that one need to condition their mind in order to succeed. Passion helps us to condition ourselves and stay at the upmost state. We need to truly love and believe on what we desire to achieve. So we could achieve.

Before we can influence one another to take our opinion, we need to 1^st influence ourselves and create such certainty in our mind. We need to drive our mind to influence our body. We need to present ourselves in a positive way with great confidence on what we are about to do or say.

No matter what are you facing now, start to train your mind. Allow yourself to pick up your mind and body. Allow yourself to take charge of your own emotion. Focus on things that you can make a different instead of those you have no control. Talk to yourself positively, and demand for happiness. Remember there is nothing to fear, but fear itself. Do not afraid to fail, because failure will make you a better person. Do not afraid to fail, because failure will lead you to success.

Stay away from those who are trying to stop you for dreaming big. Stay away from those who are trying to settle their dreams on you. Live you life the way you desire, and prove to no one else but yourself. No one can simply please anyone before there is an actually accomplishment, so stay on your feet and keep moving forward. Every step you made lead you one step ahead to your goal. Find your passion and enjoy every little bit you have done for such passion. Live no regret in life, as it is short. Do not allow anyone to stop you from your dream. 

Selfishness

Understood that this is my 1^st post of the year, and I should choose a more positive title to encourage everyone. However, I promise this won't be as bad as you thought and wasn’t any bit demotivated.  I still understand my role as a soft skill trainer, so keep reading on.

Through my career and life, I have always heard accusation of selfishness. Employee accuses their boss being selfish for not increasing the salary or extending work hours. Parents accuse their children being selfish for not listening to their opinions. Brothers accuse one another being selfish for no particular reason. After spending so much time listening to all these blame, I have obtained a simple conclusion; “Poor Communication” or “Misunderstanding”.

All the above accusation of selfishness was due to poor communication or misunderstanding. Employee accuses their boss being selfish, because there is no proper communication between the front line workers and top management, which results misunderstanding. Parents desire to have children to take their advice, but fail to receive their children’s thought. Parents often believe their opinion is better due to experience, but they fail to identify their children as an individual with own ideas. For such, misunderstanding appears.

In fact, I can’t really explain what’s the actual problem between brothers or sisters, because they often accuse each other for no particular reason. Some may say one is not taking the responsibility to take care of the family. Some may disagree with one’s decision or plan. However, I would say it is all about misunderstanding and poor communication. Family with the above problem often do not have a direct communication channel, but through members. Therefore, all the information received has been interpreted already with additional flavor.

Anyway, I just hope this article can awake those yet to understand that there is no such thing call “selfish” in this world. We just didn’t communicate well. Whenever you want to accuse someone for being selfish, think again. Because that someone may have help you or support you in another area, where in this case he or she has just happen to stand in a different point of view against yours. In such way, you will realize that all this accusation is totally meaningless, unless you desire to surrender all support from such person permanently.

At last, share a wonderful quote I obtained from my friend, and may your God bring you peace and happiness for this 2012.